fact of the day

:spermy: :spermy:

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.


* Go Ahead WG..say it ::

it is in the female species
it never stops moving

I knew you would have some sort of come back but...

The average bed is home to over 6 billion dust mites

i really wanted to know that

There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky Boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

Fact: 79,000,000 people are engaged in intercourse right now.

Fact: 58,000,000 are kissing.

Fact: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex .

Fact: 1 lonely bugger is reading emails..........


You keep reading them old GIRL.......

will do wiseguy :senior: :: ::

Thomas Edison, lightbulb inventor, was afraid of the dark!

Here's your vocabulary lesson for today.

Liquidity: When you look at your investments and wet
your pants.

In India its cheaper to have sex with a prostitute than it is to buy a condom. - No wonder we're swamped, they've filled their country and now need a second base to fill.

Average # of erections per day for a man: 11 - bloody hell, how many Wiseguys are there?

More than 11,000 people are injured every year trying out new sexual positions. - 2 of them were Mark, he hurt his wrist after breaking the wooden headboard, the other was he banged his head after he broke the base of the bed and the mattress flopped to one side leaving him to roll off at such a force :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: you had to be there!

The largest known penis to mankind was measured at 13.5 inches erect. - but wait for it....

.....In the U.S., there is, on average, three sex change operations per day. - so is the measured penis natural or manmade?

When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300°C.

The Russians used a pencil.

According to the third edition of The Official Scrabble Players Dictionary, there are 31 valid words containing no vowels.

teaching maths


1. Teaching Maths In 1970

A logger sells a lorry load of timber for £1000.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the selling price.
What is his profit?



2. Teaching Maths In 1980

A logger sells a lorry load of timber for £1000.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the selling price, or £800.
What is his profit?



3. Teaching Maths In 1990

A logger sells a lorry load of timber for £1000.
His cost of production is £800.
Did he make a profit?



4. Teaching Maths In 2000
A logger sells a lorry load of timber for £1000.
His cost of production is £800 and his profit is £200.
Your assignment: Underline the number 200.



5. Teaching Maths In 2008

A logger cut s down a beautiful forest because he is totally selfish and
inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habitat of animals or the
preservation of our woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of £200.

What do you think of this way of making a living?
Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the
birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down their homes? (There are no
wrong answers. If you are upset about the plight of the animals in question
counselling will be available.)



6. Teaching Maths 2018

? ?????? ???? ????? ????? ?? ????? ? ? ?????. ???? ????? ??????? ?? ?????.
?? ?? ????? ???

Metaphorically, the 'Midas touch' is defined as someone of good fortune, for whom everything they touch "turns to gold".

Gordon Brown is said to have the 'Andrex touch.'

:lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao:

When 12 countries switched to the Euro in 2002 it was hoped that, among other things, it would make life easier for tourists travelling between the countries. Perhaps it did.

But however many convergence tests were met by members, there remained one or two large problems when it came to monetary union. One of the most substantial lives in Lisbon Zoo and goes by the name of Jonas.

Jonas is a five-tonne African bull elephant who once earned his keep accepting escudos from tourists, ringing a belll for them and hence being fed snacks. his livelihood was threatened when travellers began handing him strange coinage which didn't meet the simple criteria he had been taught: don't accept anything under 20 escudos. his keepers had to retrain him to keep him up with the times, possibly bringing into being the world's first crash course in elementary economics for elephants.




Cool, but what was my son doing over in Lisbon Zoo dressing up as an elephant?

The Global Facts ... At Any Given Moment:

FACT: 79,000,000 people are engaged in sex right now.
FACT: 58,000,000 are kissing. (for texasgal)
FACT: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex.
FACT: 1 old timer is reading emails.

You hang in there sunshine.........

Experts say that a belly laugh can help relieve constipation.

Then Califig will go out of business!!

When the Army tested a new air defense gun called the Sergeant York, which was designed to home in on the whirling blades of helicopters and propeller-driven aircraft, it ignored the chopper targets. Instead, the weapon demolished a ventilating fan on a nearby latrine.

typical :lmfao:

Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7,200


Average # of times he will ejaculate from masturbation: 2,000

Works out to be 5,000 wet dreams, and the last 200 from actual lovemaking with the wife.

its the wifes fault

LOL, not really no, it's the pharmacy fault, they don't have headache pills that actually work!